Lesson #15,108-Losing Weight Sucks!

Okay, so it was really fun putting on the extra pounds so why is it not as much fun taking them off?  I mean, sweating and moving and eating lettuce really does suck.  I hate it!!  I wish I was one of those people who enjoys eating healthy food and working out and running but alas I'm Not!!  If you see me running, you had better run too.  Something is chasing me!!


I heard on TV that breastfeeding burns 500-600 calories a day.  I tried to get my son to breastfeed but he said that would be weird.  I guess at 13-years old it would be embarrassing.  Geez!  I mean, I could eat a meatball sub every day if my selfish child would just breastfeed!!

VERSUS   
Having sex burns about 80 calories.  Hardly seems worth it.  Sleeping burns over 500 calories over 8 hours so why not get more sleep?  If I could sleep 8 hours at night and take a 4 hour nap during the day I could burn 750 calories a day just by sleeping!!  Now that is my kind of workout!!





How many calories does lounging around burn?  How many calories does petting the kitty burn?  How many calories does writing a daily blog burn?  How about walking to the refrigerator to get another glass of wine?  How about getting a pedicure?  These are the activities that I need to know about!!  Folding laundry has got to burn calories.  Cooking dinner has to burn calories too.  Eating Nutella has got to burn calories, right?



Ahh the joys of losing weight.  Well, let me go get my celery stick and tofu.  Just kidding.  I'm going back to bed!!  Okay, seriously.  I'm going to Pilates!! Get ready, Jill!!