Would you like to be on the decoration committee for the UA Charity Auction? "Yes, of course, I would be glad to help." Would you like to be on the decorations committee for the Union County Community Shelter? "Yes, of course, I would be glad to help." Oops, the committee chair has to drop out. Do you mind being the decorations committee chairperson? "Yes, of course, I would be glad to help." Do you mind helping with the Red Cross Ball? "Yes, of course, I would be glad to help." Do you want to dance in a pro/am dance competition for the Union County 4-H Foundation? "Umm. Well, I am not a dancer." But, you have to. You cannot say no. You have to say yes!! "Yes, of course, I would be glad to help." What was I thinking???? Not only do I have to dance in front of a panel of judges but I have to take dance lessons twice a week, learn the routine, buy some dance shoes, wear a dress that is sassy enough to do the Cha Cha in, sell tickets, get people to vote for me, solicit sponsors (which I am terrible at. I will go into that later.) and arrange for my friends to come and cheer me on!! All of this while having a teenager who plays soccer in Charlotte twice a week, a husband who likes a hot meal for dinner every night, going to the gym twice a week to get my body in shape, buy proper "underpinnings" (which I will also go into later.), spray tan and get my toenails and fingernails done (before flip flop weather.) and get my eyelashes, hair and makeup done the day of the dance competition.
Now, let's talk about soliciting sponsors. This is my weakness. I never mind giving to a charity, going to fundraisers and spending money on auction items or making a monetary donation. I never mind serving food at the local homeless shelter. I actually love doing that. I never mind being on a decorating committee but ASKING FOR MONEY!! Kill me now!!! The way that this competition works is, really, the best dancer may not win but the person who raises the most money wins. Now, if I am going to dance in front of 200 people, I want to dance better than everyone else!! So, I want to win!!! I don't want to be in last place!! My sales pitch needs editing. It goes something like this: "Umm, Hi. I'm Colette Bromfield. I am trying to raise money for the Union County 4-H Foundation and I am doing a, sort of, "Dancing with the Stars" competition. If you would like to sponsor me in the competition, I would appreciate it so much. If not, that's okay. Really. Don't feel obligated to do so. Ya know what? I'm sorry for asking. Never mind." When really I am thinking "I spend a lot of money at your place of business or I send you lots of business so you really need to sponsor me!!"
Now, let's talk about "underpinnings". My wonderful friend, who is a dance instructor is allowing me to borrow a dress that she probably spent well over $2000 on. It fits, thank God, but it is very low cut in the back so my "go to" strapless bra won't work. I need to find a bra that crosses very low in the back or get one of those "stick on" bras. If you have ever worn one of those stick on bras, you know how weird those things feel. Then there's my butt!! I have recently lost about 30 pounds and I think most of it was in my butt!! I ordered a pair of panties with "booty pads" sewn in them. Most people have trouble with having a booty that is too big but mine is too small and this dress accentuates my flat booty!! Hence, the booty padded panties!!
My toenails haven't been painted since November so they are looking pretty bad. My dance instructor has asked me several times if I am going to get those things done before the competition. I have assured him that I will. I haven't had a manicure in a year so my fingernails are of varying lengths so he is concerned about that too!! I don't want to do the press on nails because, knowing me, one would pop off during the dance and I would probably step on it with my dance shoes and bust my rear end in front of everyone!! Yes, that would be funny but I am already nervous enough so I suppose I will get some gel nails put on by a professional. I also need big hair and big makeup. If you know me well, you know that I only wear makeup on days that I absolutely have to. I do not leave the house without mascara and chapstick!! I mean, I do have standards!! My daily uniform consists of yoga pants, a T-shirt and a ponytail. (I have always said that even if I was a multimillionaire I would just have better T-shirts!!)
Okay, so here is my new spill to all of my readers:
If you enjoy my blog and have a few extra dollars, please throw me a few votes. You get 10 for $10 but feel free to buy as many votes as you can afford. (It's a tax deductible donation.) Go to the website and vote for Colette Bromfield and Jason Manus. Here is the link:
http://donate.union4hfoundation.com/product.sc;jsessionid=D868A8446E491E19560ADE43A75AD9B2.m1plqscsfapp05?productId=30&categoryId=1
I need your help!! Thank you all for your votes and keep them coming!! I have a couple of people who are great fundraisers and who do not take NO for an answer that I am going up against in this competition. I will keep you informed of how I do in the competition. It is on March 22. I am quite sure that there will be a blog all about the funny moments and if I can figure out how to do it, I will post a video of the dance on my blog.
Love to you all!! Now go and vote for me NOW!!!
