Lesson #15,068-Overachieving Moms

I am not and have never claimed to be a Martha Stewart type of housewife.  If you come to my house, chances are I will not have baked a cake, made muffins or cookies just out of the oven, piping hot and ready for you to eat with a cup of hot coffee or tea.  There probably will be dishes in my sink.  There will be a mess somewhere in my house unless I have at least a one month notice to clean it up.  There will be crumbs in my carpet because the moment the vacuum is put away, a cookie or potato chip will be consumed by a crumb snatcher and we all know how they eat!!  They try to see how many chips or cookies they can get into their mouths before they choke.  Anyway so now it is Christmastime and all of the Martha Stewart types are really on my last nerve.

Who the heck has time to think of some cute little set up for Elf on the Shelf every day until Christmas?  I mean, really!!  I have cleaning and baking and cooking and shopping and that is on top of my other everyday responsibilities, like blogging, changing my Facebook status, checking my email, Googling stuff and napping.  Now you Overachievers want to make me look bad by naming your elf some cute little name and then having him doing something very mischievous every night.  Do you know who is gonna have to clean up the marshmallows that Little Fred the Elf spilled all over the counter and floor?  YEP! You are!!  Santa's elves will not come to help you clean them up.

Then you all post pics of your 14 Christmas trees.  All of them perfectly depicting each rooms different style or the personality of the person who gets to decorate them.  If I could fit an 8 foot tree in my kitchen, it would be filled with bottles of wine and jars of Nutella.  But I am not that crafty so my 4 crappy trees will have to do.  I have a hamburger and hot dog hanging on my kitchen tree.  I forgot to put the ribbon on my tree in the foyer before hanging the big ornaments on it so no ribbon on the tree this year.  Yeah I also forgot to put the ribbon on the big tree in the den too.  Sorry!!! If Martha Stewart comes here for a visit I sure hope she gives me a few days notice so I can put the ribbon on my trees!!  Actually, never mind. If I won't do it for my family, I sure won't do it for Martha!!

Merry Christmas, Y'all!!