Lesson #15,072-Girl's Trips Have Come To This...

I remember going on girls trips and having so much fun.  Acting like caged animals who have been released on a 2 day pass.  Drinking wine and doing Jello shots and dancing and singing and staying up late.  I have been on some crazy girls trips and some really fabulous girls trips to some fabulous places. Well, let me just tell you.  Times have changed.  My BFF and I went to Ocean Isle, another fabulous place, last Thursday and got there in time for lunch.  Then we went over to the grocery store and bought, not wine and Jello but junk food to eat for dinner.  We, no joke, bought cheese and crackers, shrimp and cocktail sauce, and candy.  We went home and put on our pajamas, ate cheese and crackers and shrimp and then had a dessert of candy bars.  We could have gone out to a restaurant, a bar, a club, anywhere we wanted because we were free but we are so lame that we just went home and put on our pajamas!!  We watched reality TV and talked to our children on the phone and went to bed!!  The next day we went shopping all day long.  Then we went to a restaurant and went home and ate cotton candy and didn't have to share it with anyone!! That was the highlight of my trip!!  I ate every bit of mine just because I didn't have to share it.  I am sure that my blood sugar level was over 400 but I didn't care!!  It was mine.  All mine!!

So what happened?  I mean, just a couple of years ago I was dancing and drinking and having a great time.  I really did enjoy myself but now I just want to put on pajamas and go to bed early on my girls trips from now on.  I don't want to have to drive anyone anywhere.  I don't want to watch anything on TV that is animated or has furry characters.  I want to watch trashy reality TV.  I want to wear fuzzy slippers and a thick robe.  If someone could come and give me a massage, that would just top off the trip!!  I seriously have no interest in staying up late, I feel like crap the next day.  I have no interest in drinking, I feel like crap the next day.  I have no interest in partying it up because, well, I feel like crap the next day. At my age, feeling like crap the next day is so not worth it anymore!!  Plus the whole being responsible thing.  Driving carpool with a hangover isn't much fun.  Doing homework with your middle school aged child is definitely no fun with a hangover.  Actually, that's no fun without a hangover but with one is horrible!!  At my age, a hangover lasts not just a few hours the next morning but days!!

So I guess my definition of "Partying" has changed.  I now attend parties.  I now throw parties. I now RSVP to parties.  I now am late for parties but a party is just an event now.  It is only a noun and not a verb. That's what it is.  Not a verb anymore!!  Just a noun!!
BEFORE 40 & CHILDREN:
 
AFTER 40 & CHILDREN:

Oh and did I mention that I loved every minute of going to bed early and eating junk food??  I may be lame but I love it!!!