Lesson #15,133-Children and The Elderly Are Allowed To Be 100% Honest

Okay, so I think that the only people who are allowed to be 100% honest and get away with it are children and the elderly.  If a child points out a flaw in another person or something unusual, it can be excused.  We forgive them because they are cute.  They can get away with telling Santa Claus that he has bad breath.  A child can tell someone that they are smelly or fat or mean or anything else and we can forgive them because they have no filter!  That whole empathy thing hasn't hit them yet. 
 
There are other people who can say whatever they are thinking and that is the elderly.  Now they have that empathy thing built in but for some reason we can forgive them by discounting their opinions because they are "old fashioned" or "senile".  Maybe they are those things but the truth is that they just don't care and we can just forgive their "honesty" because they are also cute!  Really??  I don't think so.  My grandmother has always been the sweetest woman on the planet but she is 97-years old and if you have gained .3 of an ounce, honey she will notice.  Then she will point it out to you.  In her sweet little grandma voice though. I wear my Spanx when I go and see Grandma!!  She don't play!!

Being 4'11", I could pass for a child but my gray hair would betray me.  I could pass for elderly and say that I have had a lot of work done!!  That's it!!!  Next time I say something stupid, which I do very often, I am going to say that I am elderly and sometimes things slip out without my knowing!!  Can I get away with it?  I guess you will know if you see me with a black eye or bloody nose the next time you see me.  Wish me luck!!