Lesson #15,129-Crap I Wish I Wouldn't Have Done

Okay, so since having a child there have been many, many mistakes made.  I have done some crazy stuff.  Mostly because I was sleep deprived and didn't have one more ounce of strength to do one more thing for one more person that day.  There have been a few things that I have done that I am not proud of.  I have thrown a towel over peed on sheets before.  I have thrown a towel over vomited on sheets before.  YES, they were washed the next morning but I just didn't have the strength or energy to take them off of the bed and put them in the washer that night.  Of course, the kid was changed and wiped off with a wet wipe but the bedding wasn't of my concern at 3am!!  Don't you judge me!!

If you are like me, you have done your child's homework before.  The kid was taking hours to do 5 friggin' problems!!  He had almost pulled out every hair from his head.  He had shed 4,000 tears.  The kid just wasn't getting it!  We were on about hour 6 of homework and again I needed my sleep.  I took the pencil from him, sent him to bed and wrote in my most horrible handwriting the answers to the questions.  Don't you judge me!!

I have lied to this kid about so many things that I cannot even keep track of my lies.  I will not even start with the obvious, Santa Claus, The Tooth Fairy and The Easter Bunny.  There are the lies that have been told about what ingredients are in foods.  This kid has thought that squid was just chewy chicken.  Come to think of it, my son has eaten many dishes that he thought was chicken that turned out to be something completely different.  Only after he had eaten them was he informed about the pseudo chicken. Until you have an extremely picky eater, don't you judge me!!  Then there are lies about what we are going to do that day.  When my son was little, he was a bit of a frady cat.  He was always afraid to try new things.  I would tell him that we were going to go do something that he has tried before and then we would do something else.  He would usually cry and scream and hang on tight but ended up enjoying whatever we were really doing.  Until you have a child who is a frady cat, don't you judge me!!

The thing that I am least proud of as a parent is when my son was about to turn 10-years old, he would sneak into the bedroom and climb in bed with me.  Of course, he would wake me up!!  Have you ever known a 9-year old who could sneak anywhere??  Anyway, he had woken me up for about the 15th night in a row and I told him that "if his friends ever found out that he was still sleeping with his mommy that they would make fun of him". Oh.  My.  Gosh.  The poor child burst into tears and wouldn't speak to me for a day.  Oh, I felt so bad!!  It was true though.  He would probably still sneak into my room if I hadn't made him think of that. Don't you judge me!!  I needed my sleep!!!