Life Lesson #15,047-The Human Body Won't Last Forever!

Good Grief!  What is the deal with the body starting to fall apart so young?  I can deal with some things but to look at myself when I was 29 and now that I am 39, ahem, 40, okay, okay, I'm 42!!  It just rips my little ole heart out!! What the heck happened to me??  I did not have jowls!! I did not have a muffin top!! I did not have gray hair!! I did not have achy joints!! I did not have saddlebags on my thighs and I most certainly did not have sagging boobs!! What the heck??  Then I look at my husband, the jerk!!  He was too skinny when we got married so now that he has put on a few pounds and has some laugh lines, he actually looks better!! The nerve of him!!

So I have to go to the orthopedic doctor tomorrow because my shoulder is hurting and I am not sure what I have done to it.  I am seriously considering having him x-ray my knee and one of my fingers because they hurt also!!  Why not just have a full body scan?  What the heck??  I have shrunk from 5'1" to 4'11".  Something must be wrong with my bones! Don't you dare say osteoporosis!!

 

No wonder so many people fork out tons of money for plastic surgery, Botox, fillers, hair dye and Spanx!! We cannot stand to age!!  Someone said that they wish everyone would just stop everything that they were doing and fight fair against this aging thing.  I say, "Heck No!!"  I can't let middle age win!! As long as I can afford a Sharpie I will never have roots!!  Haha!!  I mean, aging doesn't fight fair.  Why should I just let it win?  It will win in the end anyway, right?  Maybe I will start senility early.  Hmm. Come to think of it, maybe I already am senile.  I mean, how would I know?

Getting old stinks but coming to the realization that you have already felt the best you are ever gonna feel is depressing!!  Achy bones, graying hair, sagging body parts and the ever expanding waistline is for the birds!! Every time I almost fall down I think about how much I don't want to break a hip!  No contact sports for me!! I will just sit here and knit!!  Okay, I won't knit but I'm not going to be running bases and catching passes!! That's for sure!!

Let's make every day count!! Every gray haired, age spotted, sagging here and there, false toothed one of us!!